Who's Your Favorite?
by CaptainSkitzoVamp
Summary: Ash is a girl who has been admitted to Arkham but once there she meets a group of people with stories and an odd sense of humor.No Flames please R and R!
1. You'll Go Out In Style

**Welcome to my latest fanfiction! I started in April because I wanted to get ahead on my chapters and my other stories etc. Well here you go!And I would also like to dedicate this to Eilis who read this and pushed me to post it! Thanks for the fanart!**

_Smile, cause you go out in style_- Paramore

**Ash's POV**

I never thought that I would end up in a place like this.

I mean seriously, people always told me that there was something wrong with me but I still never thought that I would end up in this dump.

It all started a month ago when I "snapped" as some may call it. It resulted with me putting a guy in hospital but he deserved it! He's a pervert for crying out loud! Besides I didn't hurt him that badly...just an odd scar and a head wound. I could have done worse.

Well I was thrown in here after that little incident. People always say that Arkham and hospitals in general aren't THAT bad but they have no idea. Besides what ever happened to a slap on the wrist? The real bad guys and crazies were supposed to be here and if I wasn't going to be taken out of here soon I would surely end up like them. The doctors wouldn't even tell me what was wrong...what WAS wrong with me anyway?

So anyway, the first day in everyone was saying "Hello there Ashling this way please...all personal possessions are to be handed over...sleeping times...eating times...yada yada yada"

Less than an hour in the place and I have to defend myself from some guy. But I get jumpy in new places and this IS the cuckoo's nest after all so it's not my fault.

I walked into the cafeteria (if you could call it that) but as soon as I entered one of the loons tried to jump me and I stabbed him with a near-by fork. But only in the arm!

So now here I am in solitary confinement. They couldn't find a straight jacket for me but I like to think they are just too scared to come near me, especially my arms.

"So Eve ...waddya ...uhm...do this time?" asked a sing song voice which broke me out of my thoughts. It was familiar but I just couldn't place it, then again this WAS a mental hospital so it couldn't be a good sign for me to know one of its inmates...could it?

"Well you stinking oaf I just so happened to poison another guard" replied another voice which sounded muffled. Almost as if the speaker was wearing a muzzle of some kind. Yet the voice seemed strong and dignified and a little bit agitated, then again who wouldn't be?

"Aww and I missed it? Oh well so how'd ya do it?" asked a REALLY annoying voice. It obviously belonged to a man but it got kinda squeaky. There was happiness and curiosity in that voice but DAMN it really was annoying.

"Shut it Mr. Gooey" interjected another voice. It was rough but it was playful yet threatening.

What the hell was I in for now?

"Oh would you please just knock it off?" asked a REALLY superior sounding voice. It was calm and intellectual.

"Oh is my little birdy getting a headache?" purred a female voice.

These voices were coming from every direction and I should have been scared but I wasn't...huh no wonder I was in here. Wait. Would they really put me in here because I had problems feeling scared?

"Miss Kitty are you awake?" asked the rough voice again.

The Crazy Cat Lady just replied "I have been awake for a long time"

"Oh ooohh Cranie is in troooouble" sang the first voice.

"Oh shut it you idiotic clown" sneered the guy who was supposed to have a headache.

"Oooh I was even awake to here the arrival of our new visitor...hello visitor and who might you be?" asked Cat Lady.

I was stunned that she had known my presence but I couldn't help replying to her question.

"Ashling...but people call me Ash"

This received a maniacal burst of laughter from the "Clown" and Mr Ruff voice reciting "ashes to ashes dust to dust"

"You don't sound that crazy" said "Cranie"

"I honestly don't know whether to be insulted or complimented at that statement" I replied, starting to get a little annoyed all of a sudden.

The laughter erupted again and "Cranie" replied "ah so your border lining?...if you stay here you will most defiantly end up having a reason to say so a word of advice, get out while you still can"

"On a happier not" he continued "Welcome to our little underground club. My name is Jonathon Crane, I used to be a doctor here but I started playing with chemicals that played with people's fears which resulted in batman overdosing me with it...thus my incarceration here"

I didn't know how to respond so I was obviously relieved when another voice took the reins.

"Hm Ash...You might know me as Poison Ivy but you can call be Ivy" said the voice that had called the laughing guy an oaf. I kinda liked this one she seemed nice enough, well as nice as people in this place were going to get.

This voice continued however "Mr Happy over there is the Joker but you can just call him J"

A growl erupted from nearby after this statement but Ivy continued as if nothing had happened.

"Miss Kitty over there is known as Catwoman but-"

"You can call me Selina if you like" interrupted the Cat Lady.

From there she took over.

"Mr Gloop over there is probably known to as the Riddler but his real name is Edward...I don't know what you can call him we just call him random things"

Giggles erupted from the cage of which had been host to feral growls and snarls not minutes before.

"Okaaaay" I made this statement sound like a question since I didn't know what to say until the awkward silence that followed was shattered by a harsh voice.

"And what about me huh? You gave Gooby Goober over there an introduction!"

"Oh relax Freddy...she was...um...ovb-_iously_ going to get around to you. Best for las_t_ and all" said the Joker teasingly.

"Hey these marks do NOT make me a movie bad guy...I am a REAL bad guy there is a difference" growled Mr. Rough.

"And that's Harvey Dent or more so commonly known as Harvey Two-Face" spoke up Riddles.

I swore that if this place didn't make me lose my mind his voice certainly would.

"Hi" I said to all of them while trying to sooth my head by rubbing my temples.

"So...wha_t_...brings you hea_r_?" asked the Joker.

"I have no idea" I replied dully.

"What about here in...Uhm...solitar_y_ conf_iiiii_nemen_t_"

"Stabbed a guy" I replied bluntly.

"Ohhh" he started excitedly I could practically hear him jumping in delight "my kinda gal"

"It was self defence!" I retorted.

"R_iii_ght sure it...uhm...wa_s_"

"So what did he do?" asked Ivy calmly.

"What?"

"Well the imbecile had to of done something"

My mind wandered back to the scene that caused me to end up here. The guy was crazy! Okay I know that everyone here is supposed to be. It isn't called an insane asylum for nothing!

"He jumped me!"

"Ah a none-toucher eh? You certainly won't last that long in here" spoke Crane in one of his arrogant tones.

"Nah" disagreed Riddles.

Hm Riddles...I liked it. He was meant to be packed full of them but DAMN that voice was annoying! I know I'm repeating myself but you had to be here to understand.

"Well I don't know about you guys but I want to hear what Selina was going to say before we split the last time we were here" said Crane.

Hm ...maybe I could handle him. I mean can you really judge a guy who is going to be stuck in Arkham for the rest of his life? No family, no wife, not even a white frickin fence!

The Riddler...I would obviously put a bullet in his head.

The Joker...I think we will get along just fine.

Catwoman and Ivy...well...us girls gotta stick together right?

"WAIT!" shouted Harvey.

"What?" responded absolutely everyone in an annoyed tone.

"Who's you favourite?"

"What?"

"Seriously kid can you say anything except "what"?"

Crane quietly laughed at this and then said "Hm she sounds like a shrink. They always respond with questions instead of answers"

"Well?" Dent prodded.

"I don't have one, I only moved here" I responded quickly, I had always been a good actress so obviously I had grown up here right in Gotham.

"Go on Miss Kitty" coaxed Crane who was probably trying to continue his ability to fix people's mental health. Good luck.

And with that I let out a huge burst of uncontrollable and psychopathic laughter that would probably put the Joker to shame...on second thought, maybe not. I didn't want a blade or a bullet stuck in me. But it was so hard. Everything that had happened to me lately just came out in a burst to laughter and people always say not to bottle things up right?

**Well what do you guys think?**

**Review or one of these loons will come after you! LOL**

**:D**


	2. Do You Feel Like A Man?

**Well here is your next chapter! It was a forced one but not ALL chapters will be stories of the past! Cause then it would be boring for all of us! And if you don't like it maybe we can vote. Also thanks you too Rainbow-Socks-Girlie, . Nicole Napier and DarkRiddlesDestiny for your support! You guys are awsome;)And also for anyone that got a taster that mentioned "Pedal to the metal" I accidently sent you a taster form another chapter sorry...I promise not to make that mistake again and I have the link to the fanart to this story on my page  
And remember review!**

_Do you feel like a man when she push her around?-_ Red Jumpsuit Apparatus.

**Ash POV**

When I had finally finished my little sudden burst of hysteria there was a silence.

"Wow girl you have got lungs" said Harvey.

"Are you alive?" asked Riddler.

"You put the term "I laughed so hard I fell off my dinosaur" to shame", purred Selina.

"Jonny did you let off some SmileX?" asked the Joker irritably.

"I'm sorry if I stole your scene J" I said, trying to patch things up with the psychotic clown.

"Don'_t_ call me J" he snapped.

"Fine then Mr. Grouch" I retorted. "Just don't steal Christmas"

I know that I was over doing the sarcasm but COME ON! I was stuck in a dark cell. Cut off from everyone and everything! I was stuck with villains! And they expected me to be all perky and happy. Look at this place! It's a dump! So excuse me if I get bitchy!

"ANYWAY, Selina please continue" interrupted Crane.

"I was going to say something but I can't remember sooo, okay" she said but this time she sounded like a teenager about to spill some MAJOR gossip.

I miss gossip.

"It all started..."

Her soft words made me close my eyes and picture everything with my imagination

_It was a cold dark night and there was an eerie chill in the air. A girl was walking home and trying to shield herself against the cold with her long thick beige coat. She couldn't have been older than nine but her eyes held a past, had seen what no one should see especially at such an age. She turned a corner and ended up in front of a door that led inside to an apartment building. The snow was beginning to fall and the girl looked relieved to finally be getting some shelter but also a little scared of the shelter that she was entering. She stepped inside and started to climb the stairs immediately._

_When she finally reached her door she looked around to see if there were any lingering faces and then entered her apartment still looking a little jumpy. Once inside she heard screaming and arguing so she took a peek into the living room only to see her parents fighting, when all of a sudden there was a smacking noise and her mother fell over. Her father was red in the face and a look of complete rage was on his face while her mother lay on the floor while trying to place a hand over the tender area on her cheek where she had just been slapped by her husband._

"Was that when it began?" asked Crane pulling me from my thoughts. I would have been angry but for once I was actually interested. I have never really been one for gossip even though I said I missed it but I just like the way people get really excited and I like being kept up to date but I NEVER talk about anyone behind their back.

I hate rumours.

Ah yes rumours. Before I was incarcerated here I was subjected to a huge amount of rumours but you know what? I don't care and for once I actually don't mind being in Arkham. Hm I wonder if the doctors would have a problem if I were to be moved permanently to solitary confinement.

"Yes it was and then it got worse until one day when I was coming home from school"

"And how was school for you?" asked Crane with his professional voice.

"The usual. Nerdy quiet girl gets taunted and bullied. I even had the huge hair and glasses to match" she replied sarcastically but we all knew that she was just covering up the sadness and heart break. I knew exactly what she was doing and the show that she was putting on wasn't just for us but also for herself because a part of her believed that whatever happened she was still somehow responsible even though she wasn't.

"So what happened then?" continued Crane.

"What happens to everyone else...she died because she let him have his way" she replied while I drifted back to my imagination.

_The room was quiet and everyone had just left. The blonde haired girl was older now, around 15 and she was dressed in black while sitting at the kitchen table. Her father stumbles in and slurs "Are they gone?"_

_The girl doesn't look up from the table but nods in response._

_The man just walks off towards the living room as if it were a normal Wednesday night and his wife hadn't just been buried earlier that morning._

"So what happened then?" asked Crane.

Damn I hate being interrupted, well others being interrupted but she WAS going to continue.

Impatient much?

"He made me his slave. I worked night and day. Cooking and cleaning. I tried to turn to my education as an escape but everywhere I turned there were people that just wanted to torment me but eventually I got away and came here only to have a murderer for a boss" Selina said quietly but she couldn't help but laugh dryly at the last part.

"When you say slave did he ever try to..." asked Crane a bit uncomfortably.

"Oh God no I ran and got beaten to a pulp whenever I expected that he wanted to" the Cat woman scoffed in response.

"And where did you begin your love for cats?" asked the ex-doctor curiously.

"I always loved them. They were my only friends in a way".

I clearly heard the reminiscence in her voice.

Sniggering came from the Riddler's direction after she said this and white hot anger instantly flared up within me. How dare he? It was a wonder that she was even sharing. I mean the way that Crane was trying to analyse her did same as if he was trying to fix her but what would he gain? An empty cell? Oh well people have their own reasons for what they do don't they? Well sometimes...

"When did you finally escape? How did he take it?" asked Crane.

"Well I had started a part-time job when I was 16..." began Selina

_A grown up girl with messy tied back blonde hair was saying good bye to her co-workers at a coffee shop and just walking out the door._

_The night was quiet and there was a warm breeze. The street lamps let off a warm orange glow along the pavement and no one was in sight._

_The girl looked around to see if anyone was watching her but she also looked nervous and a bit scared. She stopped outside the apartment block door and entered after a ten second hesitation._

_She walked up the stairs to get to her apartment and quickly opened the door and rushed inside. Once inside she ran to her room. It was empty with hardly anything on the dressers. Not a poster was in sight or anything that any normal teenager would have in their room. The girl reached down to pull out a bag from under her bed. She obviously didn't own much since it seemed to be all crammed into a back-pack. She slung it over her shoulder and walked out of the room to the kitchen. She went over to the drawer in the kitchen and produced a paper and pen. She wrote a quick note for her father to tell him that she was leaving and not coming back but that she would contact him. She felt bad for not telling him personally but she was too scared of what he would do because just last month he had given her a black eye when she had told him that the rent was due!_

_But just then she heard a grunting noise from behind her. She was terrified but she turned around regardless. Her father was standing there in all of his rotten glory (a vest and a pair of dirty jeans) he was covered in stains and was partially drooling._

_This was going to be bad._

"_Where do you think you are going?" he slurred._

"_Out" replied the frightened blonde._

"_You were just out and you haven't cooked dinner yet...WHERE IS MY HAM?" Shouted the drunk._

_Before Selina could reply her father had gripped her hair and has bashing her head against the table. Again and again. Selina started to feel a bit nauseous and could slightly feel a wet substance in her hair._

"_STUPID BITCH CAN'T YOU DO ANYTHING RIGHT?" he screamed in her ear._

_He grabbed her throat and started to lift her slowly from the ground._

_Selina struggled feebly against his iron-like grasp and started to try and claw at his hands to make him stop but it was no use. She was starting to see black around the sides of her vision and these black spots were starting to increase until eventually her father threw her to the ground. _

_But now it was only kicking time. She tried to protect her stomach but that just gave a clear entrance to her face. That hurt even more._

_She was sure that she would carry these injuries for months when this was over with but she WOULD leave tonight even if it killed her. She grabbed her father's leg as it came to attack her again and bit down as hard as she could. He yelped in pain and kicked her full force in the face. She made an attempt to claw at him but he saw it coming and kicked her in the stomach before she could move any further._

_He crouched down to her level after he had decided to stop._

"_Now this is how things are going to be run from now on .You're gonna quit that job of yours and you are gonna stay right here...got that?"_

_He didn't wait for a reply. He just picked her up by the hair again and whacked it off the ground and went over to stand by the door. Selina got up slowly and went over to the cupboard and began to take down cans. She was trying to find one that was heavy and that could do damage to someone's skull. Her father thought that she was beginning to follow orders again._

"_I want my ham cooked properly...none of that rare shit" he stated as if cooing to a baby who is trying to learn to ride a bike and is trying to get back on after just falling._

_Selina was getting angry and she knew that this just had to stop! She wondered over to the drawer with the cutlery and picked up a knife and a tin opener. She hid the knife in the pocket of her back hooded jumper and held out the tin opener to make the facade even more believable. _

_Her father turned around to go back to the living room and watch some more television. She tip toes in after him and raised the knife over her father. This man was her father! But he had beaten her sensless after he had done the very same to her mother and had killed her! If he didn't do this now she would end up the dead one. _

_The knife came down and the first spray of blood splattered on the wall and the television._

"So it was your first kill as well?" asked Mr Birdie.

"Hm yes...but I like to think that my first kill was myself" Catwoman said.

"How do you think that?"

"Because when I died and when I was reborn I completely killed my past-self and turned into who I am now"

At that moment a keys could be heard rattling and a door was slammed open.

"Alright Dent it's time to go back now say good-bye to your friends" one of the men dressed in white said in a snarky tone.

"Bye guys!" called Two-Face as if completely oblivious to the sarcasm.

"Bye" they all called back. Ivy said it as sweet as a housewife. The Riddler said it as if he had found out that he had just become a Dad. Catwoman obviously purred and the Joker muttered it in a low growl but that was probably because he was still angry with me.

_Great I'm not even in the joint a day and I have to patch things up._

_**Oooh Joker is angry! Tune in next time to see what happens on "The Adentures of Arkham!"**_


	3. I'm the kinda human reckage thatcha love

**New chapter! At last. Were you excited? Will you review? Sorry I'm in questioning mode. Did you shoot Mr. Burns? I'll shut up know enjoy! Sorry for the slow update I ended up at a surprise sleep over!**

_I'm the kind of human reckage that you love!- My Chemical Romance._

Ashling sat in the silence for a few minutes until it was broken as usual. _These loons obviously don't like their silence...it's probably why they love their good 'ol mayhem._ These thoughts were running through Ashling's head until she remembered that she needed to apologize. And it seemed to everyone else that she did too.  
Fidgeting could be heard until Ivy finally said "Oh for Pete's sake say you are sorry already!"  
"Me?Why should I apologize to her for stealing my scene!" exclaimed the Clown Prince.  
"I didn't steal ANYONE'S scene for your information! And in case you didn't notice we are in a mental asylum!" shot back Ashling.  
So Joker that must put you off of her favourite list" randomly pointed out the Riddler. It was obvious by the way everyone heard the murmur of words that he was leaning his chin against his fist  
"Shut it Boogers!" retorted the Joker who was starting to get really agitated.  
"Make me!"  
"SHUT UP!" screamed Ivy, Selina and even Ashling in unison.  
"So who IS your favourite?" pressed the squeaky voiced genius.  
"I TOLD you I am not from this place!" cried the Raven haired girl in frustration "And even if I did, do you really think that I would tell you?"  
The truth was that she was just saying this out of sheer curiosity. She really DID have a favourite but she wasn't going to tell anyone of them._ Damn that Two Faced son of a-  
_Before she even got to finish her thought the slamming noises had returned again and she went to take a peep out of her cell window. The shackles made it difficult but she managed it just in time to see two of the men in white carrying a man by each of his arms. The man was alright looking. He was of an average build and was a white toothed blonde...like one of those toothpaste commercial actors. But the other side of his face said different. It was all burned and scarred charcoal flesh. Some of the skin was missing so his eyeball and mouth on the burned side looked bigger which kind of made it look as if he was smiling in disbelief.

This was THE Harvey Two-Face.

Ashling couldn't help but stare in awe but stopped herself when she felt some drool going down her chin. She looked around to the other cells across from her and saw two other faces looking back at her. One was a messy red-haired woman with big blue eyes and green tinged skin. Her expression said that the woman was evaluating her the same way that Ashling was doing to her. The other woman staring was a messy blonde who must have been the Cat Lady of the place.  
Two-Face was locked into his cell and the guards left.  
"Hey, I've been thinking we need to get outta here and when we do I was thinking of revenge and I love to hold people down so..." began Ash.  
"Spit it out" snapped the Riddler who was beginning to get fed up with Ash's "Beat around the bush" attitude.  
"I'll let you stab the guard J" said Ash in a sweet yet sad voice.  
She was still gazing out of the barred cell that she was being held captive in. Selina winked at her and Ivy seemed to be giving her signals with her eyes as if to say "Well Done". Then again the red haired woman WAS in the cell across from the Joker so he could probably see her.  
There was a muttering noise and then the Joker said "Fine but I get to ride shot-gun in the getaway van."  
"Done" Ash could almost hear his smile spreading across his scared face. She wondered if he was allowed his face paint here in Arkham. She had seen him on TV. Well the news to be exact. She had seen him smile and giggle while holding some Batman obsessed fan, named Brian, hostage. The poor guy had ended up hanging from a building in his Batman costume while grinning...Chelsea style. Ash wondered how she had come to end up here with the man who had done that!  
He had started to giggle again. She could get used to him but she didn't think that she could put up with Boogers over there.  
"I love a happy ending" said Two-Face sarcastically.  
"So why are you back in here all of a sudden?" asked the Joker, finally interested in speaking. Ash could hear his chains rattling as he moved about trying to get comfortable for the coming story. She might as well do so herself. She uncrossed her legs and realised that the blood flow had stopped so she started to walk around in her cell to get her legs to return to normal. When she thought everything was fine again she sat down and leaned her head against the door with her back facing to way out of the room. She stared at the little whole in the wall with bars on the outside that was supposed to serve as a window. The sky was dusky and a soft pink was coming through the "window".  
"Well as you know I was down here for three days so they had to let me out but the doctors wanted to "talk" as usual, when you get out" there was a murmur of agreement at this. Ash took a mental note of this and continued to listen. "Well I had Dr. Miller" at this statement there was an uproar, Accusations and colourful words flew everywhere, a few of them were actually new to Ash even though she had grown up in a pretty tough place, then again these were hardened criminals. "Well you know how he is, well any way he got too annoying with the whole feelings thing he does and I..."  
"What?" asked the Joker impatiently.  
"I stabbed him in the leg with a pen" replied Harvey bluntly.  
"Yay..not only did you come back here to play with us, but you also temporarily got rid of the Doctor"said Ivy.  
Three days he had spent in solitary confinement. Ash couldn't believe it. How could anyone survive like that? As soon as this thought hit her she heard her stomach rumble.  
"How do you guys survive down here? Don't you eat?" asked Ash who was starting to feel agonizing pain from her stomach.  
"Well we have Ivy to thank for that" pointed out Selina.  
Before Ash could question this statement an apple tree started to sprout right in front of her. It started to get taller and taller and then the little buds appeared looking like Christmas baubles but they got bigger and changed into deep red and green apples.  
Ash momentarily thought what the Joker and the Riddler ate. The Green apples?Pears?  
Could Ivy make more than fruit?  
Ash gratefully took one of the large green apples and took a bite. It was delicious. The juices from the apple were amazing and it was at that moment that she realised to full extent of her hunger.  
When was the last time that she had eaten?  
She reached out for another apple and ate it in record time.  
She ate the entire tree in no time.  
"Someone was hungry" pointed out the nature goddess in the cell across from her.  
Ash got up and looked out of her cell through the mini barred window as she had done earlier that day.  
"Thank you" she said sincerely.  
Ivy looked back at her. Ash could see her smile beneath the muzzle on Ivy's face.  
"Why do they make you wear that?" she asked half with curiosity and half with sorrow. This woman shouldn't have to live like that, Ash thought.  
"Because she loved to suck the face off of the guards" said Crane boredly.  
"Whoever said love was dead probably meant to say that it is a killer" added Harvey.  
"And he would have been dead on" Selina murmured.  
"I wouldn't know" said the Riddler.  
If those walls weren't separating all of them Ash was certain that everyone would have been staring at him at that moment.  
"Aw Mr. Goober, what happened?" asked Catwoman.  
Everyone knew that she was refering to HIS story.  
"Yes" added Crane interested in something at last.  
"What happened to you Edward?" asked Ivy softly.

**And that is where I shall leave you! I am evil aren't I? Well your going to have to wait for the next chapter! And please remember reviews are love! If you don't I am sending the boogyman after you!**


	4. Dead Before You Hit The Floor

**Yay new chapter! This one is dedicated to my awesome new friend . who has helped me with new ideas for this story but I still need your reviews so …...yeah just keep reviewing! Oh and before I start I want to explain what Ashes "solitary confinement is". The solitary confinement in this "FICTION" is a dungeon type of thing. Each inmate is locked in a damp and stoney room with a thick door that has a window type of opening with a few bars on it to stop anyone from trying to claw anyone standing outside. Also, they can here each other well because of this "window thing" and also (the main reason) this is a FICTION. I also apologize for screwing up my "your"'s and leaving out commas etc.  
I am also sorry for wasting your valuable time on this A/N and maybe even my entire story.  
And on we go!**

**Oh yeah and also I wanna shout out to Anna Zee who is on vacation at the moment, all you twilight fans might like her stories. And sorry for not sending out tasters this week but I have been VERY busy.**

_**Dead Before You Hit The Floor- Linkin Park**_

_Ash's POV_

Grrr I honestly did not know how to feel? I mean I was honestly curious about his story but on the other hand I didn't want to hear him yap on and on about himself.

"If you do decide to tell us your story will you please try to put on like a deep voice or something?" I asked bluntly without thinking._ Oh well they won't know why I asked him that AND he did say that he didn't like beating around the bush_

He didn't say anything and just plunged into the story WITH the deep voice I may add.

"It started when I was born I guess..." he began "My dad was a real military guy"

At this sentence I could just imagine a Drill Sergeant yelling at a new baby that was crying in their crib. I couldn't help but inwardly laugh at this. I could hear the Joker laughing out loud instead.  
_Nice to know that someone is sharing my brainwave.  
_I threw my head back nonetheless and closed my eyes for the on-coming story.

_A little boy stood in front of a uniformed man with his head down and looking as if he was trying to hold back tears. He couldn't have been more than eight years of age.  
The older man was shouting at the little boy.  
There was a woman watching from the other side of the room, just watching the interaction between father and son.  
The boy was in trouble because when he had made his bed that morning, but he had left a crease in the sheet and his father had seen it as an abomination._

'Stupid perfectionist'_  
"If you were in my army you would be gone by now!" had said the father.  
He had lectured the boy for a good half hour and when he was finished he asked the boy if he understood.  
The boy just said "Sir yes Sir" and stood there looking at his shoes until his father dismissed him. On his way out his father had called after him "And for God sake's stand up straight, don't slouch!"_

_This was the young Edward Nigma._

_The boy walked to his room and once inside locked the door and sat in the corner. He started to let out the tears that he had held in all day to slide down his face._

"Was you father always like that?" asked Two-Face.

"Pretty much "replied the Riddler, who was still doing the deep voice thing.

"Was he a perfectionist...would you say?" questioned Crane.  
_'Woo Brainwave day! Haha and that's what landed Riddles in here'_  
"That wasn't his only problem" responded Edward.

_The scene changed to a young teenage boy working at his desk. He seemed intent on his work until a loud bang echoed through the room. The boy swung around to face the door and saw his father looking around the neat room. For a teenage boy it was highly unusual to have a clean room._

"_What are you doing solider?" he inquired in his Sergeant voice.  
The boy knew that he was in for it now._

_"I was finished my homework,chores and study so I started to work on a machine that I am constructing at the the moment...sir" replied the teen. He couldn't of been any older than 15. He had dark brown eyes and short red hair that was shaved like a soldiers. The only thing that took away his solider look was glasses which were held together by sellotape. _

_"Who said that you were to build a machine?" asked the Sergeant, who was coming towards the table that held the young boys work.  
"I have told you before that if you are finished everything you are to run laps, not to play around with this junk. We have people to build these things for us" argued the teenagers dad, and with that he picked up Edwards pride and joy and began to pull wires, like pulling the tape from an old cassette. When he had finished that task he simply broke the little gizmo in half. He then turned around and pushed his son on the ground. "Drop down and give me a hundred and when you are done with that go run laps until your mother calls you for supper"_

_Edward began his assigned push-ups while his father walked out. When he was at the door way he looked around and said "And clean this mess up!...pathetic...you will never amount to anything, life isn't about brains" and with that he finally left leaving his son on the floor._

"No offense man but your dad was a prick...that is assuming he is gone" I said unable to restrain myself.

The Joker cackled at this and said "Thata girl...you are finally thinking ...uh... clearl**y**"

"Did you ever try to stand up to your father, Edward?" asked Crane still using his professional voice.

_Yeah Matilda much?_

"Yeah I mean, If I had a guy acting like that to me he wouldn't even make it to the hospital,actually he would be dead before he hit the floor" added in Harvey.

_The scene now showed a young boy of seventeen or eighteen in a tuxedo. His mother was fussing over him and looked as if she was trying to hold back tears.  
"Don't cry mom" said the boy smiling at his mother._

_"Don't worry she isn't crying out of happiness, she is crying cause you don't have a date since you don't play sports" said a familiar voice from the doorway._

_The mother whimpered in real sadness and looked over with her son. His father was there but he didn't look as neat and orderly as he usually was. His shirt wasn't tucked and a few of his coat buttons were opened._

_"Sports has nothing to do with it" replied Edward icily._

"_I met your mother when I played football" half slurred the Sergeant._

_Edwards father had hit a rough patch in his career and had eventually been let go of his job and was replaced by a younger man. In his books that was a disgrace and he had taken to hard liquor which had made it no surprise to Edward that he had a bottle of Jack in his hand.  
"Why can't you be normal? Why can't you have a girlfriend or play sports like everyone else?" asked his father, no coming to stand in front of him._

_"Something wrong with you boy?" and with that sentence he slapped his son across the face.  
"No and not everyone is like that...not everyone has to do what you tell them to!" retorted Edward._

_This was followed by another slap.  
"YOU OBEY MY RULES WHILE YOU ARE IN THIS HOUSE!" shouted the drunken Sergeant.  
"WELL MAYBE I DON'T TO BE UNDER YOUR ROOF!.MAYBE I NEVER WANTED TO!" screamed back the son. The mother who had been fussing lovingly a few minutes ago had retreated to the kitchen where she silently let her tears slide down her cheeks._

_"THIS PLACE IS HELL! LOOK AT WHAT YOU DO TO PEOPLE! LOOK AT MOM FOR GOD'S SAKES" she heard her son shout in defense until she heard the sound of wood snapping. She ran into the room only to see her son walking in her direction and about to turn around to face his father who was holding a sharp piece of wood that used to be a table leg.  
"NOOOO"screamed Edwards mother and she ran in front of her son just in time for the wood to pierce her flesh.  
Time froze._

_"LOOK WHAT YOU MADE ME DO YOU UNGRATEFUL LITTLE BASTARD!" shouted Edwards father, who went to take a swing at him just then, but the young boy dodged the punch and picked up the nearest thing that he could find. A golf club._

_Before the Sergeant had time to chance another attack Edward hit him over the head and didn't stop hurting his father. All of the pain and suffering that he was forced to endure throughout his life was channeled in the golf club and Edward went mad with it, like Sweeney Todd and his tea pot._

_When he finally did stop he looked down at the bloody mess that was once his father. There was no movement._

_Edward dashed over to his mother who was fighting for breath. Her clothes were drenched in her own blood and the piece of wood was sticking out from her stomach. Edward pulled it out which made her gasp but relax a little._

_"Edward" she managed to choke out, "What ever you do in life I will always be proud of you" she whispered._

_"No no no no you're gonna be fine. We are going to be okay. You will go to a hospital and we will go on, just the two of us, he's gone now!" Edward said trying to lighten up everything.  
"I love..." she began to say but never got to finish. The most important thing that she wanted to tell her son and she never got to finish it._

_Edward, in his blood covered tux, knelt by his mother and wept. It was all his fault._

"That's so sad" said Ivy, her voice breaking at the end as if she were trying to hold back sobs.  
"Nice to know that we have something in common" half whispered the Catwoman.

The room was an echo of silence of which no one dared to speak.  
"What's this for?" asked the Riddler using his normal annoying voice again.

"Just take it" said Ivy, who was probably sending him a tonne of fruit. Ash wondered what the inside of Ivy's cell looked like...probably covered in green plants and flowers...she was probably sitting on a comfy chair of moss and vines hanging from the ceiling.  
This gave me an idea that was probably the best that I have ever come up with.

**Okay I know that no-one really died before they hit the floor literally but in a way Edward had died inside before he hit the floor to be near his mother. AND THUS THE RIDDLER WAS BORN! woo!**


	5. The Innocence is Gone

**New Chapter! Review please! Review!**

_Everybody wants to be the bomb but once you are the bomb the innocence is gone- Mindless Self Indulgence._

There was complete silence for a few minutes until Harvey spoke up in his rough voice.  
"Who?" asked Crane, not catching what he was saying.

"Ash the newbie"

"Oh great that's my name, is it? The newbie?..Just great...BRILLIANT!"Ash said.

"Don't lose the...uh...rag. Doll" spoke the Joker from his side of the room.

"Why do you want to know what she is thinking?" asked Ivy, trying to get the conversation to get back on track.

"Cause" simply said Two-Face.

"I have an idea!" blurted Ash, who was having enough of the stupid questions, "Ivy how far can you stretch your plants?"

"I don't know...far enough. Why?" Ivy replied curiously.

"How does it work?"

"I can see what my babies see and I can tell them where to go. Like how I know that you are sitting in the corner right now and scratching your head since you are chained instead of being in a straightjacket"

Ash looked down at the floor and saw a rose bush beginning to form under the crevice between the floor and the door. The buds were starting to sprout beautiful roses of every color. Ash had never seen anything like it before. She touched her forehead dramatically and asked "What am I doing now?"

"Getting a bit too deep into theatrics" replied Ivy.

Ash could here a few chuckles but continued "And what are the guards doing?"  
"Hm...Usual guy stuff...looking at issues of playboy, eating red meat, T.V-"

"But do you see keys?" Ash cut in.

"Well...uh...ever**y** guar**d** has...uh...keys around he**re** Doll" the Joker responded for the plant woman.

Ivy didn't seem to care about the interruption but still answered regardless. "The skinny guy with the huge glasses has the most"

"You mean the guy with the teeth?" asked Harvey.

"Hook Nose?" added Crane.

"Oh please that weakling?" purred Selina; her voice was thick with sarcasm.

The Riddler didn't say anything but the Joker burst out in a high pitched giggle.

-

The plan was set. When the guards came with food Ivy would get one of her plants to leave off that gas thingy that made guys go crazy for her. Then she would get one of them to release her and she would then poison him. After she had done that she would release the rest of them.  
The good news was that this would be easy to accomplish. The bad news was that they would have to wait until tomorrow, since that was the only time that they would give them the food, which was once every couple of weeks.

"I can't believe I am finally getting out of this joint" remarked Harvey.

"They should have a revolving door here for me. I'm so good at busting out, don't you know?" commented the Clown prince of Crime. "Five bucks says that Riddles will be back here before the week is over"

"HEY! I heard that!" exclaimed Edward in his annoying voice.

"Deal" replied Two-Face.

"What are you gonna do when you get out?" asked Selina, her voice was muffled so it was obvious to everyone that she was leaning her chin against her hand.

"I'm gonna get me a tonne of diamonds" Harvey spoke.

"I might go to my mother's resting place" Edward replied.

"I want to go the Amazon" said Ivy.

"I'm gonna torment Batman again" said the Joker.

"And what about you?" Catwoman asked Ash.

"Erh...lemme think" Ash responded.

Ash had nowhere to go really. Her parents would only throw her back in here again since they probably didn't want her any more. Her friends would definitely run away.  
"I don't know" she said in a voice filled with honest realization.  
"Well then let me rephrase that for you deary...what have you always wanted to do? If you won the lottery what would you do?"

"Well...I would like to stay here in Gotham...I would get a big house hidden away...get a dirt track in my back garden or a paintball range...One thing is for certain though...when we get out, we have to meet up"

"Yeah" squeaked Riddles.

"Paint ball range" muttered the Joker in curiosity.

"Couple of drinks?" suggested Two-Face.

"Good idea-" Riddler began but stopped himself. "How old are you?" he finished differently.

"Sixteen since last week"

"Do you drive?"

"I never had a lesson yet if I had a chance I would definitely go behind the wheel...pedal to the metal you know?"

High pitched laughter broke out and Ash jumped.

"Like I said...uh... befo**re** my kinda gal" said the Joker.

"Wait wait stop!" interrupted Harvey."How can you not have a favorite one of us? Gotham born or not you have to know us"

_Back to acting again_ thought Ash, so she simply responded by saying "I just moved here! I don't even know where the mall is! Or the park!"

Ivy scoffed when Ash mentioned the park.

"Well you've gotten to know us so decide!" demanded Harvey starting to get pissed.  
Is he bipolar, thought Ash.

"WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM?" screeched Ash.

He was acting just like a guy from her class, when she went to school. His name was Carl and he was the nosiest and most egotistical guy that Ash had ever met. He would always ask you questions about yourself but never give any information on himself and if he did, it would only be a snide remark or a boastful sentence. Every time Ash had a bag he would always ask what was in it, every time she had a different colored extension in her hair he would ask her why she did it, he always flirted with the young teachers. And above all he was annoying. When she had first started school he was always following her around like a puppy but once she told him about her personality and how she liked heavy metal everything went down the drain.

"What's my problem?" retorted Harvey.

"Yeah...ever since I got thrown in here you have been tormenting me about which of you is my favorite! You are worse than Eric Cartman singing Poker Face!" shouted Ash before leaving out a scream of frustration. She thought that she sounded like a mad woman but she didn't care. Her thought was seconded when Crane said "You have finally cracked as I foretold"

"So what? Now you're an oracle? Mr. Prophecy Guy?" replied Ash sarcastically.  
"Hey Ash you know that's not what he meant-" the Riddler tried to say but Ash cut him off and attacked him next.

"Oh and you! Mr. Annoying voice, you HAVE to back HIM up...villain for villain right? In order for me to be accepted here do I have to try and kill Batman or take over Gotham?" she said.

"Ash-" someone tried to say but was cut off when she screamed "WHEN THE IS THE FUCKING ORDERLY COMING WITH THE DAMN FOOD!"

There was a silence.

None of them had really heard Ash swear before.

When he thought that the coast was clear, Crane simply said "What about you Ivy? What's your story?"

"Okay...if that's okay with everyone else" Ivy said, which was obviously directed at Ash.

"Sure" she growled along with the rest of them with her teeth clenched.

**I was listening to South Park songs, that's all I will say**

**Remember...Review!**

**And as usual you will get a taste of what's to come: D**

**Skitz**


	6. I Don't Want To Live In A World

**Heya guys! I'm back and I have a new chapter with me. It's nearly over but I am thinking of an epilogue. You should check out my other story called "Joey's Story" if you liked my writing. This story was originally intended to be a one-shot but a friend of mine influenced me to do a chapter-by-chapter story, so thanks' to her you got inmates back stories and stuff! The epilogue might even have a back-story ;)  
anyhow, thanks again guys for sticking with me, you guys are awesome!**

"And what IS this plan, might I ask?" Ash said in a sickly sweet voice.

The Joker stopped walking and turned to look at the black haired teen. She just looked up at him as if he were anyone else. She wasn't scared of him.

"Ya know Doll...I'm kin**da **beginn**ing** to ...uh...li**ke** you" he said, pointing a finger to her. He then proceeded to walk briskly down the corridors until they came to a little opening in the wall. Well it didn't really look like one. In fact it looked like one of those small doors that you have to open up to get to the fire hose but when the man leading the way opened it, it turned out to be an opening. Ash was caught by the collar and pushed through the opening. As soon as she got inside she moved out of the way for the other people. While the others were climbing in, Ash took in her surroundings. She was standing in a narrow pipe room. Steam was everywhere and she was sweating with the heat.

When the last person climbed through the opening, the Joker closed it behind them and went to the head of the group again.

"You would make a good tour guide J!" Two-Face called out which was followed by a hard thump, which was Selina's way of saying 'Shut-The-Hell-Up!"

"Ouch"

"I'm more of a...uh...blow u**p** the bus kinda guy, rather than...ah...tour on the bus guy, ya know?" the Joker said while beginning to walk down the narrow room, if you could call it a room.

Ash looked back to see her fellow inmates.

A look of disgust was on Ivy's face and Dent looked like more of a goofball than ever. Selina was elegantly moving in a fast pace while dodging the red hot pipes. Just as she was about to turn around to face the Joker gain, Ash crashed into something that was red hot. She instantly jumped away after yelping in shock and noticed that she had, in fact, walked into the pipes. She hadn't seen the sharp turn that the Joker had taken and had accidently walked into a wall of pipes.

"He he he he he he he" the Joker began to laugh so hard that he had to hold his ribs since they seemed to be aching badly from the laughter.

"That was just fantastic" Crane said sarcastically.

"Hey leave the kid alone. Getting burned is not funny. It's actually a very painful business." Harvey said defensively as he walked over to Ash and tried to examine the damage but she just turned away to block his view. She kept her hand to her neck as she did so, so Dent took note of this so he could check it out later.

Harvey Dent had always dreamed of a loving wife and kids before everything had happened. Rachel had been the woman that he wanted to marry and he had pictured the white picket fence and Friday night dinner. He had wanted to have a son and bring him camping, teach him right from wrong and how to ride a bike. But his dreams had been shattered into a million little pieces and he knew that that was never going to happen. All he had now was half a face and a life of crime, so he was better off enjoying it.

They were led along even further into the pipe room until they finally reached another opening in the wall, which Ash was unceremoniously pushed through.

She waited as the rest climbed into the empty hallway. Joker looked around and said "This is th**e** ...ah...quite part of the join**t** "

Ash just nodded and continued to follow him down the hallway until they came to the faculty bathroom. She also noticed that it was a 'men's' room and froze.

"We are not going in there" Ivy said as if she were laying down the law.

"Fine Toots the girly room is over there" he clown man responded and pointed to the next door.

Selina left out a breath that she hadn't noticed she had taken in and strode over confidently in to women's room.

"What is it with the bathrooms?" Ash asked as if she had been annoyed by a younger sibling.

"Climb ou**t** the window and...Ah...we will see you on the othe**r** side"

She nodded and ran into the women's room after Selina and was shortly followed by Ivy.

"Ugh that clown really annoys me" she said upon entering and saw Selina climbing through the window since Ash had just told her what the plan was. The window was up to Ash's waist and the lower half of the glass had been pushed up. Selina gracefully slid out of it and motioned for Ash to follow. She draped her leg over the windowsill and Selina caught her by the hand and pulled her through. Next was Ivy, she slipped through just as gracefully as Selina had which made Ash randomly say "Have you two ever done gymnastics?"

The two women in front of her began to laugh but they were cut short after hearing a yelp from a few yards away. The Joker was pulling Crane a bit too roughly through the window and he was trying to protest but the Joker simply whacked him on the back and continued to pull. Crane tried to hit the Joker at one stage but ended up getting bitten by him instead.

"That's definitely gonna get infected now, since you don't brush your teeth"

"What can I say, It's me" Joker had responded before starting to pull again.

Eventually Crane had budged and fell on top of the man that had been pulling him. They both ended up on the ground and Crane was on the Joker. An awkward silence followed and a mixture of awkwardness, hilarity and terror filled the air.

"Birdie?"

"Yeah" Crane responded with a gasp, obviously still in pain.

"Get of me...now before I murder you and EVERYONE knows that I like to make it long and painful" he growled the last bit.

Crane jumped off of the Joker as fast as possible and looked around. There was barbed wire fencing off the building and everything went downhill, so even if they got passed the fence and had to run –which they probably did- they would probably fall and hurt themselves. At the end of the hill there were walls surrounding the area.

"And how do you propose we get though all of these barriers?" Crane sneered, trying to cover up the embarrassment at what had just happened moments before.

"All in good time" the Joker practically sang as he looked around "Now where is Goobers, that's a question you should be focusing on"

"Well we tried but you started talking about t being "part of the plan" Ash snapped with her arms folded against her chest.

It was getting cold now and the inmates could see their breath as they exhaled. Ash looked around at her fellow companions. Selina was looking around back and forth as if expecting an attack while Ivy just looked cold and bored. Dent was looking off into the distance with a pensive look on his face and Crane simply stared at the Joker with annoyed face. The Joker didn't seem fazed by this and just looked up into the night sky.

There was a noise nearby and the six of them looked over to the right and saw a trolley full of clothes coming over to them. It was so full that the person that was pushing the trolley towards them couldn't be seen over the mass of clothes. A giddy sound of laughter could be heard, coming from the other side of the mountain of clothes.

"Riddles?"Asked Harvey, with a disbelieving look on his face.

"The one and only!" the Riddler exclaimed, jumping out from behind the trolley.

"Your here" Ivy couldn't help but say.

"The Goober came" Selina said in an unexpecting tone.

**And there I shall end you! Don't worry, I'm not gonna kill you LOL  
you guys know what to do by now!...Review!  
There was something else I wanted to say but I forgot****  
Skitz;)**


	7. Caught at the End

**Sorry about the long wait but 3 weeks are finally up. Which means one thing...I'm BACK**

**The last chapter was given its name because of the song by Marilyn Manson 'Fight Song'...I had written that in but it disappeared somehow.**

**Any who...here is your Longley awaited chapter**

**Enjoy!**

The Riddler remained standing there as the others stared at him. After a few minutes he got uncomfortable.

"What?"

"How-" Ash began to say but was cut off by the Joker's loud boom of "I TOLD YOU SO!...When I lie everyone believes me but when I tell the truth everyone isn't ...uh...able to believe i**t**"

"Ever read 'The Boy Who Cried Wolf?" asked Crane sarcastically.

"MY COIN!" exclaimed Harvey.

"We are trying to bust out and he is worried about his stupid coin, marvellous" said Ivy with a hand on her hip.

"How are we going to move our clothes?" asked Selina, beginning to get agitated. It was so easy to lose track of conversation in a place like this. Every conversation would jump topic easily.

"Yeah, we just got out of the bathroom, so it's not like we can change in there." Ash piped up.

"And I don't think that Craney boy over here would want to have to go through the window again" Harvey joked from Cranes side, jerking a thumb in Cranes direction.

Crane scowled at Two-Face and turned back to the conversation at hand. "So what do we do? We can't leave our things behind!"

"What are you so worried about, all you have is a sack, Joker over here has to keep his entire suit clean...well...until he see's Batsy again" Riddler intervened.

"Well if you would all shu**t** u**p** and listen I could tell you, but maybe no**t**" the Joker stated with his hands crossed and an angry yet calm look upon his face, you had to see it to have believed it.

Everyone just stared at him.

"Come on" he said before turning around and walking off. The others just stood there, rooted to the spot and looked at him with their mouths wide open. He seemed agitated.

He turned around and said "Are you coming or not?" Before turning around and starting off again.

This time they all trekked after him, Riddler still pushing the trolley.

A couple of minutes later they came across the kitchen area. Their leader had stopped and begun to pull at the shrubbery, which revealed a hole. It wasn't very big but it was large enough to fit everyone through, one by one.

No one hesitated or stopped to ask what they should do. Everyone each grabbed their belongings from the trolley and threw them over the fence.

"All right, smallest first" the Joker said as he motioned for Ash to move.

Ash got down on her hands and knees and began to crawl underneath the fence. The wire mesh cut her back and ripped her uniform but she didn't care, she was moving towards freedom, and the uniform sucked.

She made it to the other side a few minutes later and looked up at the others. Ivy was next, followed by Selina and Harvey had said "I'll go ahead of you 'cause I have more to live for" to Crane, which had resulted in a fight.

By the time the women had made it across, Crane and Harvey were on the ground and the Joker was trying to break them up."You will get us caught now hurry u**p**!...Idiots"

Crane went through first and just as Harvey was coming out from under the fence, everyone heard the sound of dogs coming their way.

Everyone picked up their things and ran except for Ash, who was rooted to the spot. The Joker was still at the other side of the fence.

"Come on!" Ash whispered to him, loud enough to hear.

He wasted no time and quickly began to crawl as the dogs came into view, he was halfway through when the dogs grabbed his leg and began to attack but Ash rushed ahead and began to try and pull him out.

The dogs were growling and Ash could tell that the man on the ground was trying not to cry out in pain. It just wasn't in his character.

There was a ripping noise and eventually the dog lost the fight and Ash was helping her fellow inmate to stand up.

He grunted as Ash picked up their things and began to try and lead him down hill but it was no use, and they were too slow so the Joker pushed her on the ground and said "Rock and Roll, just be careful with the rocks" and he himself started to roll down the hill that Arkham was placed on top of.

Ash tried not to hiss in pain as she hit stones and prickly thorns and nettles. But they arrived in no time, so she got up as fast as she could and looked around. The dogs were watching them while they were barking but no doctors or guards were on the scene yet and her accomplice was trying to stand up. She helped him up, but not without saying "We gotta to hurry before they catch us".

After that, the two inmates ran away into the night.

**Sorry for the extra long wait but my parents decided on a holiday to our mobile home and I am being dragged again on Saturday but at least I got this out!**

**I also notice that there is no song to quote form but obviously I am in a hurry.**

**But I WILL be writing while I am gone and even though this is the end. I can guarantee you all that there is an epilogue and MAYBE a sequel (it depends on reviews)**

**So you all know what to do: REVIEW and you might get a sequel perhaps.**

**Also if you liked my work you should check out "He's Coming" and "Joeys Story" and I am also working on a new fiction so look out for that**

**It was a pleasure writing for you all**

**Skitz**

**;)**


	8. Cause You're My Favourite

**You finally got your epilogue, I wanted to make it great but I'm sorry, Joey was updated today and I got no reviews for him. Also if you guys would like a sequel I would love to hear more about it in reviews, a storyline maybe?**

**Please writing for you guys**

**Skitz;)**

Epilogue.

Ash sat back in her chair and soaked up the sun

This time last year she didn't like the sun but a lot had happened since then. Arkham had taught her to cherish her freedom and in that space of time she had learned to love her freedom and not to take it for granted. She had become a, some what, outdoor person.

The smell of burning filled her nose and she raised her sunglasses to see Harvey busy in front of the barbeque. He was wearing a cheesy chef hat and an apron that said "Praise the Chef or be incarcerated."

Selina was lying off on a chair to her left and Ivy was doing the same to her right. Both women had their sunglasses on and were peacefully basking in the warmth of the day.

On the other side of the deck, Riddler and Crane were tied down to a chess game while the Joker watched and tried to put the players off.

"Serves up!" called Two Face. He closed down the barbeque as the other headed towards the table of food.

Ash wrinkled her nose at the food. One thing that hadn't changed after her incarceration was her vegetarianism.

She got some salad and bread and went over to the wooden table to eat with the others.

"Not a girly diet thing I hope" Two Face commented, pointing a fork at her food as she took a seat near him.

"God no, and even if it were one of THOSE diets I think that I would have a hell of a lot less on my plate."

"So how has freedom been treating you guys?" Riddler asked as he shoved a fork full of rice into his mouth.

"I got a new lab and I am currently working on a new and improved toxin" Crane replied, eating with perfect grace.

"For a guy with brains and suits you gotta know your etiquette, you obviously don't follow it and it ruins your look" Ash said playfully.

"Funny" Crane responded sarcastically, but it was obvious that he liked her, which was something seeing as it was him.

"I hate stereotyping" muttered Ash randomly into her food.

"What about you Face? Got yourself a diamond?" Riddler said, getting back on track.

"First day out! Big one too! Tonnes" Harvey replied enthusiastically.

"What about you Riddles, watcha do?" Joker said in a fake voice of caring, trying to hide his silent laughter by drowning it out with food. Crane made a look of disgust at the Jokers disregard for table manners.

"I went "began Riddler, looking over to see Joker and Crane have a little kicking fight before continuing, "To my mother's grave and I have been tending to it."

"That's so sweet" Ash commented.

They spent the next half hour catching up on what each other had missed out on. Catwoman had found a new hide out and had been giving it a makeover while Ivy had been in the rainforest.

Joker had been playing mind games with the city again; apparently he had been behind some explosion that had killed over a thousand people. Batman had hit a brick wall with him this time, even worse than before.

"And you got your house and your range" commented Harvey to Ash.

"Yup, I am home schooling myself too, it's all good" Ash replied with a small smirk.

000

The rest of the day was spent on the paintball range. It had all been fun and games until Riddles had been accidently hurt by Harvey. Joker had taken that opportunity to make things worse and remained shooting at the red haired man as he was still on the ground.

Eventually the game had to be called off and everyone went inside for a few drinks.

"Yanno, I see why you picked this house thing!" Two Face slurred after another bottle of beer, "It's beautiful, if I ever had a daughter, I'd want her to be just like you, yanno that? I'm serious, you're awesome!"

"Yeah yeah, thanks" Ash muttered as she helped Harvey get into the van, "Come back soon" she said before hugging the drunken criminal.

She turned around and nearly crashed into the person that had been standing behind her. She looked up to meet the clown in the eyes. He cut straight to the point and said, "Why did you help me that night to escape, you could have left me there, the rest of them did."

Ash didn't know how to respond, they were out of that hell hole now so she didn't see any harm in telling the truth.

"You really wanna know?" she asked with a smirk.

"Mm Hm"

"Cause you're my favourite"


End file.
